The Magic Crystal Shop was nestled in a triangle where the pier forked. The lower level opened on both forks of the pier. The upper level was Dr. OMG's apartment and had a panoramic view of the harbor. He could look out to sea and watch the seals sleeping on the buoys. He could watch the tourists come and go on the pier. From his bedroom he had a view of the cozy little rectangular marina and all the shops and restaurants that lined it on three sides.
For the first time in all his years of babysitting Petunia Fountainbleute, she was agreeable and eager to go to bed early. She took her medication without fuss and went straight to bed.
Dr. OMG decided he would deliver a Christmas present to his good friend Bart Gusto who had just purchased a tour boat he named "SISYPHUS II" after the independent book store he'd owned for forty years which recently went under due to the changing times.
Bart had decorated his new boat with every conceivable Christmas decoration. It stuck out like a sore thumb.
"I can't stay for dinner, " Dr. OMG offered his regrets. They had planned to spend Christmas eve together. Bart had prepared quite a party spread and was devastated by the news.
"I prepared hor d'oeuvres de mepris! Enough so we could complain until New Years Day!" Bart picked up a tray and offered his friend an appetizer.
"I am babysitting without notice again. I thank my lucky stars that she went to sleep without incident for a change," Dr. OMG explained.
"Well, have a drink at least, one drink," Bart was lonesome and trying not to think about how bad business was.
By and by both men lost track of time and were roaring drunk. Bart opened his present from Dr. OMG. It was a can of paint.
"What?" Bart was confused. "What kind of present is this?"
"I'll tell you why you have no customers, my friend. No one wants to get into a smelly old boat called 'SYPHILIS'! You need to change the name," Dr. OMG offered.
"SISYPHUS! Day and night, man! SISYPHUS!" Bart gasped.
"You talk as if you believe we live in a literate society! Shall we take an opinion poll, ask every passerby what the name of your boat means and see who is right?"
Bart took a deep swig directly from the bottle and flopped into a deck chair.
Dr. OMG took the bottle, held it high in the air and began to talk to it.
"Alas, I know thee well. Thou hast my reason killed and my thoughts made muddy....."
Bart got comfortable and settled in to enjoy the soliloquy.
Twelve year old Mark Twain's and twelve year old Nikola Tesla's jaws dropped as they eavesdropped with their fingers laced in the chain link fence that surrounded the boats bobbing in the marina.
Without missing a beat, Dr. OMG spun on his heels holding up the can of paint where the whiskey bottle had been.
"How would you boys like to make a few bucks?"
~ TO BE CONTINUED ~
