It was snowing in New York that winter of 1894. Nikola Tesla was absorbed in the task of calibrating the equipment. Mark Twain had agreed to be his guinea pig and was not nearly as nervous as he should have been. In the spring Nikola would do a good job appearing to mourn the loss of all the results of his work in the 5th Avenue laboratory fire of March 1895. The truth was that the data had been moved to a more secure location because they had stumbled upon something that mankind was simply not ready for.
Mark listened intently but not to what Nikola was warning him about. Mark had his ears tuned to the icy streets outside. His face lit up when he heard the carriage coming to a halt. He limped quickly towards the door, disturbing some equipment in the process and nearly falling to the floor.
"Are you determined to break the other leg," Tesla cried out.
"Get the door! Get the door! He won't deliver the package unless someone signs for it!" Mark fretted and struggled to regain his upright position but the leg pain was too much.
Tesla signed for the package, gave the delivery boy a tip and wished him a Merry Christmas. After he closed the door he continued to scold Mark.
"No one is to know you are here. I just signed for a package with your name on it. What is all this?" Tesla protested.
"He didn't see me! Bring it here," Mark was cheerful. In spite of the leg pain he opened the box and prepared a festive spread from the contents. Oysters on ice. Crab. Lobster. Good liquor. The finest cigars and pipe tobacco.
"What, no dancing girls?" Tesla shook his head, amazed at his hedonistic friend's delight in such things when his life was on the line.
"I'm sure they are in one of these tins. Add water. Presto! Angels on the half-shell!" Mark laughed.
"Don't you think you are celebrating prematurely? This could be very dangerous, you know." Tesla cautioned.
"All the more reason, my dear friend, all the more reason to celebrate before said catastrophe. If you are going to roast me alive, I had better partake now as I will be in no condition to enjoy then. Besides, I broke my leg before I could finish my lunch and I'm sure being properly nourished will only help with the cure," Mark reasoned.
After the party, Tesla helped the inebriated Twain up onto the platform. He took what would have been known historically as the first successful x-ray and helped Twain to a nearby chair in a small chamber. Twain rested while Tesla developed the film.
"Oh it's not just broken! It's broken clean in two! Look at this!" Tesla showed Mark the x-ray of his body. They both admired the film and sighed deeply.
"I'm so sorry you will never be able to show this to anyone," Mark was guilty and he knew it.
"It is your fault. Someone else will eventually discover how to do this. I've placed anonymous hints. We have to keep a low profile. It can't be me," Tesla replied wistfully but with a warm smile for his good friend.
"Before you flip that switch, tell me again. I am at home with Livy and the girls celebrating Christmas?" Mark wanted to be clear about it.
"Yes. We sent the version of you from one day before you broke your leg doing things you promised Livy you would never do again, namely letting me experiment on you. We did this to save your Christmas and your marriage. And now we have to save the world to boot! Who knew a simple lunch could blossom into such a mess! We are both insane. I have in my hands a major breakthrough in science and medicine which I cannot share with anyone because it incriminates you and will end your marriage. Not that any of this matters since we found out the world is ending unless we can find a way to fix that confounding mess," Tesla sighed.
"Yes, I can't imagine explaining to Livy that I broke my leg in the future," Twain agreed.
"Well, you are currently unwrapping presents with your family as if none of this is happening," Tesla sighed and then threw the x-ray on a desk.
"Does the me at home with Livy have any common sense?" Twain asked.
"I don't see how. I can't create content," Tesla answered.
"I'm ready if you are," Twain announced.
"Let's mend that leg then," Tesla flipped the switch.
Mark Twain's curly hair stood on end as he was enveloped by blue light. Filled with adrenaline he jumped out of the chamber before Tesla told him to.
"Eureka! Livy will never know! Integrate myselves! I don't want to be two people anymore!" Twain danced around on a leg that was obviously no longer broken.
"Don't get too happy," Tesla said with his head turned sideways, frowning.
"What? What is it?" Mark demanded.
"After I integrate you there is a good chance you will be completely bald, Mark," Tesla turned away to hide that he was holding back a smile. "I knew we should have done more research, but you were in pain and we rushed things we should not have rushed."
"Why would I be completely bald, Nik," Mark pursed his lips.
"Because you are now," Tesla pointed over his shoulder without looking back. Twain turned and looked at the chair in the chamber. It was covered with his curly locks.
~To Be Continued~
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